The therapist reveals the 7 things more important than being in love in a relationship — and the questions to ask to test how you feel about your partner
- Therapist shared the seven things that are more important than love in a relationship
- Jeff Guenther said the focus should be on support, respect and understanding
- Shared the seven questions people should be asking themselves about their partner
- Bitesize Advice proved a hit with viewers, who said they wished they knew sooner
Feeling a deep sense of love and affection is a key element of any healthy long-term relationship.
However, one expert insists that contrary to popular belief, this is not the most important thing.
In a new TikTok video, Jeff Guenther, a therapist from Portland, Oregon, explains that there are seven other key factors more important to the fabric of a healthy relationship, including feeling your dreams are supported and the ability to set healthy boundaries to put .
Feeling a deep sense of love and affection is a key element of any healthy long-term relationship. But one therapist insists it’s not the most important thing (stock image)
“I love that you like your baby and I bet they like you too, but mutual liking or love only gets you so far,” he said.
The expert, who has garnered a 2 million-strong following with his bite-sized relationship and mental health tips, shared four questions everyone should be asking:
In a new TikTok video, Jeff Guenther, pictured, explains that there are seven other key factors more important to the fabric of a healthy relationship, including feeling your dreams are supported and the ability to set healthy boundaries
The tips proved to be a hit with viewers, many of whom said they wished they had known these deeper questions before their wedding.
One wrote: “Fighting with my ex left me feeling hopeless, drained and like I had to drop my needs to comfort someone else.”
Another commented, “This is the first relationship I’ve been able to say yes to these questions…”
A third added: “I’m appalled at how this makes me feel about my relationship.”
Jeff regularly shares checklists with viewers to test the health of their relationships.
The tips proved to be a hit with viewers, many of whom said they could be applied to both friendships and romantic relationships
Last year he published the 12 questions all couples should be able to answer about each other six months into a relationship.
He said that knowing how your partner defines success and how their family has influenced their growth are “important foundations to build on.”
Other questions relate to what comforts your partner when they are sad and stressed and what illuminates them internally.
The video has been liked more than 1.3 million times on the social media platform.
Revealed: The 12 Questions You Should Be Able to Answer About Your Partner
Therapist Jeff Guenther LPC from Portland, Oregon shared these 12 questions to ask and answer together after six months. He said you’re doing “great” if you can answer nine out of 12.
1. What makes them laugh or cry?
2. What are you passionate about?
3. How has your family influenced your growth?
4. What makes you angry?
5. Do they have spiritual beliefs and how can they influence their life choices?
6. What are your defining moments?
7. What is most important to you?
8. How would you define success?
9. What kind of support do they need when they are stressed or sad?
10. What are you most proud of about yourself?
11. What can make her instantly glow inside?
12. How do they recharge their emotional batteries?