- Firouzeh Akbarian and Sofia Bettiza
- BBC World Service
2 hours ago
Credit, Manuella Bonomi
In Iran, virginity before marriage is important to many girls and their families, a value deeply rooted in cultural conservatism.
Men sometimes ask for a virginity certificate a practice that the World Health Organization (WHO) considers contrary to human rights. But over the past year, more and more people have fought against it.
“You made me marry you because you’re not a virgin. Nobody would marry you if they knew the truth.”
This is what Maryam’s husband told her after they had sex for the first time.
She tried to reassure him that while she hadn’t bled, she had never had sex.
But he did not believe her and asked her to issue a certificate of virginity.
This is not uncommon in Iran. After getting engaged, many women go to the doctor and get tested to make sure they’ve never had sex.
According to the WHO, the virginity test has no scientific value.
Maryam’s certificate stated that her hymen type was “elastic”. This means she may not bleed after penetrative sex.
“It hurt my pride. I didn’t do anything wrong but my husband kept insulting me,” she said. “I couldn’t take it anymore, so I took some pills and tried to kill myself.”
She was taken to a hospital in time and survived.
“I will never forget those dark days. I lost 20 kg during that time.”
Maryam’s story is the reality of many women in Iran. Being a virgin before marriage is still crucial for many girls and their families. It is a value deeply rooted in cultural conservatism.
But lately things have changed. Women and men across the country have campaigned to end virginity testing.
In November, an online petition received nearly 25,000 signatures in a single month. This was the first time the virginity test was openly criticized by so many people in Iran.
“It’s an invasion of privacy and it’s humiliating,” says Neda.
When she was a 17yearold student in Tehran, she lost her virginity to her boyfriend.
“I panicked. I was afraid of what would happen if my family found out.”
Credit, Manuella Bonomi
caption,
“I spent all my savings. I sold my laptop, cell phone and gold jewelry,” says Neda
So Neda decided to fix her hymen. Technically, this procedure isn’t illegal but it has dangerous social implications that no hospital will agree to do it.
Confronted with this, Neda found a private clinic that would do it in secret at a high cost. “I’ve spent all my life savings. I sold my laptop, cell phone and gold jewelry,” she says.
She had to sign a document to take full responsibility if something went wrong.
A midwife then performed the procedure, which took about 40 minutes.
But Neda would need many weeks to recover.
“I was in a lot of pain. I couldn’t move my legs,” she recalls.
She hid everything from her parents.
“I felt very alone. But I think the fear of them finding out helped me bear the pain.”
In the end, the ordeal Neda endured was in vain.
A year later she met someone who wanted to marry her. But when they had sex, she didn’t bleed. The procedure failed.
“My boyfriend accused me of trying to get him to get married. He said I was a liar and broke up with me.”
Although the WHO denounces virginity testing as unethical and of no scientific merit, the practice is still practiced in several countries, including Indonesia, Iraq and Turkey.
The Iranian Medical Organization claims they only perform virginity tests in certain circumstances such as court cases and rape allegations.
However, the majority of applications for virginity certificates still come from couples planning to get married. That is why they resort to private clinics, often accompanied by their mothers.
There, a gynecologist or midwife will take a test and issue a certificate that includes the woman’s full name, her father’s name, her ID number, and sometimes her photo. This document describes the status of her hymen and includes the statement: “This girl appears to be a virgin.”
Credit, Manuella Bonomi
caption,
Most applications for virginity certificates still come from couples who want to get married.
In more conservative families, the document is signed by two witnesses usually the mothers.
Fariba Doktor has been issuing certificates for years. She admits it’s a humiliating practice but believes it helps many women.
“They are under so much pressure from their families. Sometimes I verbally lie to the couple. If they have slept together and want to get married, I will tell their families that the woman is a virgin.”
Many men say that marrying a Virgo is still important.
“If a girl loses her virginity before marriage, she cannot be trusted. She can leave her husband for another man,” says Ali, a 34yearold electrician from Shiraz.
He says he had sex with 10 girls. “I couldn’t resist,” he says.
Ali acknowledges the double standards in Iranian society, but sees no reason to break with tradition.
“Societal norms accept that men have more freedom than women.”
Ali’s opinion is shared by many people, especially in the more rural and conservative areas of Iran.
Despite growing protests against virginity testing, many believe a full ban by government and lawmakers is unlikely in the near future given the practice’s deep ingrained in Iranian culture.
Hope
Four years after Maryam attempted suicide and was living with an abusive husband, she was finally able to get a court divorce. Just a few weeks ago she was single.
“It’s going to be really hard to trust a man again,” she says. “I can’t imagine getting married in the near future.”
Along with tens of thousands of other women, she also signed one of the growing online petitions to end the issuance of virginity certificates.
Although she believes nothing will change any time soon, maybe not even in her lifetime, she hopes that one day women will have more equality in their country.
“I’m sure it will happen one day. I hope that in the future no girl has to go through what I went through.”
All names have been changed to protect their identities.
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