Body language expert reveals six signs youre dating a narcissist

Body language expert reveals six signs you’re dating a narcissist

A body language expert has revealed the top six signs you’re dating a narcissist — and it has nothing to do with how often you look at your reflection.

If you talk to FEMAIL Dr. Louise Mahler speaks, while the selfie culture and obsession with one’s looks may seem narcissistic, that’s actually nothing to worry about.

The body language expert says true narcissists don’t just love themselves — they love a grandiose version of themselves that’s starkly different from reality.

“Loving their inflated self-image allows them to avoid deep feelings of insecurity,” said Dr. Mahler.

dr Louise Mahler revealed exactly how to find out if you’re dating a narcissist and how to assess whether you can stay in the relationship long-term

While relationship expert Dr. Lurve explained that Dr. Early on, the narcissistic behaviors uncovered by Mahler should be seen as red and pink flags.

dr Mahler says that narcissists tend to have exaggerated or overly dramatic facial expressions, but it can be hard to spot, which is why understanding their key traits is important.

“When it comes to smiling, a narcissist’s smile never really reaches their eyes,” she said.

She added that this is worrying because Australians are naturally “trusty in a smile”.

‘Research by SmileDirectClub shows that almost 50% of Aussies think people who smile appear warm and 60% think those who smile appear more welcoming. In turn, warm and welcoming behaviors like smiling can make them more likely to take advantage of their partners, especially when their words don’t match their facial expressions,” she said.

dr Mahler explained that narcissists believe they are unique or “special” and can only be understood by other special people.

Narcissists have grandiose self-esteem

“They just want to connect and be associated with other high-level people, places and things and are too good for anything average or ordinary,” she said.

“Many narcissists also show strong signs of superiority over others and come across as the only ones capable of being right.”

according to dr It’s important to Mahler not to argue with a narcissist who says it’s always going to get awkward because he “can’t be wrong.”

Narcissists take center stage

Narcissists believe they are better than everyone else and expect recognition, says the expert, and always want to be the center of attention.

“They often exaggerate or lie about their accomplishments and talents,” she said.

“When they talk about work or relationships, all you hear is how much they contribute, how amazing they are, and how lucky the people in their lives are to have them.

dr  Lurve, pictured, warns that many narcissistic behaviors are red flags - and warns against letting them slip early in a relationship

dr Lurve, pictured, warns that many narcissistic behaviors are red flags – and warns against letting them slip early in a relationship

“Anything that threatens to burst the fantasy bubble is met with extreme resistance and even anger, so those around the narcissist learn to be careful about their denial of reality.”

She said people who find themselves “in the shadow” of a narcissist need to focus on their own dreams.

“Rather than get lost in the narcissist’s delusions, focus on the things you want for yourself,” she said.

Narcissists blame others

dr Mahler says that while finger pointing is a classic response from people “in the construction industry,” people who are narcissists take it a step further.

“If you ask a contractor why a job isn’t moving faster, you’ll quickly learn that it’s your fault for not ordering the materials or not paying the deposit on time,” she said.

adds that this is a learned behavior within a cultural group.

It becomes particularly dangerous when you hit a level higher.

Narcissists will manipulate you into believing that none of their actions led to their consequences and will actively work to portray you as the manipulator in a situation rather than taking responsibility.

“Staying true to what you believe in and having the courage to stand up for yourself to a narcissist will unfortunately not change their perception, but it will make you feel safe in these situations.”

Narcissists are extremely resistant to behavior change, even if it causes them problems

Narcissists can be demanding, make a decision, and will push through with the decision regardless of the impact — particularly on their partner, she explained.

“Because they think they’re special, narcissists really believe they should get whatever they want,” she said.

“So if you’re dating a narcissist, you have to ask yourself if this is the right choice for you. It’s important to remember that narcissists aren’t looking for partners; they seek obedient admirers.”

Take advantage of others without guilt or shame

“Narcissists view the people in their lives as objects — there to serve their needs,” said Dr. Mahler.

“As a result, they don’t think twice about taking advantage of others to achieve their own ends.”

dr  Mahler said that narcissists don't think about how their actions affect others because they believe they are the only important person in the room

dr Mahler said that narcissists don’t think about how their actions affect others because they believe they are the only important person in the room

She said this is sometimes malicious – but more often than not they don’t really realize they’re doing it.

“Narcissists just don’t think about how their behavior affects others.”

Often demeans, intimidates, bullies, or belittles others

“Narcissists feel threatened when challenged in any way,” she said.

“Their defense mechanism is contempt, and they put people down. They can do this in a condescending or condescending manner, or attack with insults and derogatory remarks.

“The problem is that this leads to our own insecurities, which we cannot easily recognize and accept as normal behavior. So look at how the narcissist treats others. If the narcissist lies, manipulates, hurts, and treats others disrespectfully, he or she may treat you the same way,” she said.

dr Mahler says that while it’s possible to stay in a relationship with a narcissist, it’s “not easy” and you have to “be honest with yourself.”

“A narcissist isn’t going to turn into someone who really appreciates you, so if you decide to stay, you need to look elsewhere for emotional support and personal fulfillment,” she said.

Red, pink and green flags explained by Dr. lure:

Red flags:

Red flags are the most common when we talk about dating because we are drawn to the flashy and negatively connected behaviors we see in potential partners.

1664686522 550 Body language expert reveals six signs youre dating a narcissist

Common warning signs include over-controlled behavior, insecurities in oneself and low self-esteem, any type of abuse including substance abuse, codependency, and narcissistic traits or lack of trust.

Watch out for behaviors where your date doesn’t communicate well. This can include being unclear about times and places, being insensitive to your needs and feelings, and those thinking about past relationships or those who can’t stop talking about their exes.

Other common warning signs can include if your date is rude to a waiter or staff, obsessing over their self-image, overreacting to normal situations, or love-bombing (affecting someone with extreme attention and affection).

Pink flags:

A new kid on the block in colored flag theory, pink flags is about identifying certain traits or values ​​in your partner that might bother you in the future — something that can potentially become a red flag or turn off.

It may have something to do with different political viewpoints, moral beliefs, different opinions on things that are important to you and what you want in the future.

Common pink flags are that they don’t have the same 10-year plan, such as B. desire to have children, travel, relocation or career priorities.

We often see a couple where one person wants children and the other doesn’t, they stay in the relationship thinking that the other person will change their mind at some point.

Another pink flag to watch out for is different love languages ​​and ways of communication – if these are not recognized early in the relationship, this can become a red flag without you realizing it, until it becomes an all too hard deal -Breaker will ignore.

Green flags:

We love celebrating green flags.

In general, the dating narrative is all about the warning signs of what not to do and who to avoid, but we can rarely focus on which signs to look out for as they are positive and all systems go.

Something I believe should be a standard in every relationship is mutual trust and respect because without those green flags you’re in for a toxic and bumpy ride.

Having clear boundaries and letting each other be individuals is also an important green flag, because a healthy relationship is just two individuals choosing to live a life together while still enjoying their own autonomy.

Body language green flags may not seem that easy to spot, but they are just as important and can be key if you know what to look out for.

Keep an eye out for that cheeky smile. Research from SmileDirectClub suggests that over 30% of Australians find that the most attractive feature of the face is their smile. Feeling cool and calm confidence in a potential partner, especially if they smile a lot around you, is an instant green flag.

Another green flag is taking the time to get to know each other and respect each other’s interests.

In addition, thanks to the communication levels, you can deal with each other honestly and transparently even in difficult times. Both partners make time for each other, are sexually connected, and pay attention to each other’s needs; Those green flags are so underrated.

Source: dr Lurve – as communicated to FEMAIL